I Wasn’t Insulting Your Intelligence-I Was Insulting Your Stupidity
I Wasn’t Speeding-I Was Qualifying
I’m Not Really A Bitch-I Just Play One In Your Life
I’m Sorry I Called You An Asshole…..
If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport
If At First You Don’t Succeed, It’s Probably Not Twist-Off
If I Agreed With You-We’d Both Be Wrong
If I Can’t Fix It-It Ain’t Broke
If I Had To Pick One Word To Best Describe Myself-I Suppose It Would Have To Be:-Can’t Follow Orders
If it has tits or tires it will cause you trouble
If Life Hands You Melons-You May Be Dyslexic
If My Dog Doesn’t Like You-I Don’t Like You